The Proof is in The Pudding ...

I started here. 

Organic tea.  See how it says "stress relieving and energizing" ... I had such high hopes.

But, alas ... I quickly moved on from the organic tea to plastic.  Hangers, that is.  I walked into our closet one afternoon and noticed the plethora of mismatched plastic hangers.  And while I'd never noticed our hangers in the two plus years we've lived in this house, all of the sudden it became sizzled in my mind as something needing to be resolved!

So, I had a date at Costco.  Walmart.  OfficeMax.  I hit up Joann's and ended up with ...

Sameness.  Order.  Way better than the non-working stress relieving tea :)

And then ... I let J. How in on the action.  You see that art piece on the shelf.  The hand prints.  His special touch.  

And then I made the top of a quilt.  For what?  For where?  For who?  All really great questions without many answers.  I decided, one day, that quilting would be my newest hobby.  If only we lived in a place where snuggling under a blanket was necessary!

And then ... an early birthday present from my mom.  A chandelier in our bathroom.  I'm in love.  Because really, with all boys in the house ... there needs to be a little sparkle to offset all the bugs and dirt!

And then ... more painting.  A garage sale find.  $5.  I added a wood medallion "of sorts" to add a bit of interest and it now has a new home in our hallway ...  

And finally ... 

Two new white pillow shams.  Thanks in part to the "As-Is" section of IKEA .. (they used to be a lonely curtain panel) and my mom ... the sewing QUEEN!  Then a trip to TJMAXX for a green something to toss at the bottom of the bed ... and I'm done.

For this week.  Or for today.  Or for the next twenty minutes!!

And in in case you're curious.  I've stopped taking the organic tea.  I've moved on to the good stuff.  Muscle relaxers!  They're not really working either ... but if you call about 45 minutes after I take them ... you might get a good laugh!

The Mess

In 1984, I was seven.  I had a gap between my two front teeth that was large enough to stick a pencil through and made it equally impossible for me to whistle.  My mom always said that gap gave me character.  I hated it.  I wanted it fixed.  

When I turned 13, my hair turned curly.  My mom used to run her fingers through my hair,  wanting to steal a little of my Shirley Temple look for herself.  She said I was lucky.  People would kill to have hair like mine.  I hated it.  I couldn't find enough hair products in the kingdom to make my hair less huge.  I wanted it fixed.  

Now I'm 31, quickly closing in on 32.  My gap is fixed and my hair is less curly than ever (thanks in part to a flat iron) and I've realized something about myself.  A pattern.  I like things being fixed.  I'm not so fond of things being messy and unresolved.  I'm great at projects.  Projects have a beginning, a middle and an end.  I like looking at rooms in need of help.  I can't take my eyes off a couch or a wall until I find the perfect thing to fix the glitch.   

This year has been challenging for me.  For a person who likes life to look a certain way, this year has been anything but "pattern friendly."  I like things being fair.  I like "rule followers" to be rewarded.  And since you live in the same world I do, you can imagine that I have lived many of my days a bit frustrated and disappointed that the "good guy" doesn't always finish first.

April and May were hard months for me.  Each day had an uncharted path.  There was no equation for how the day was going to go.  No medical website to give me comfort and peace.  Medical specialists disagreeing on the images they saw.  One day, up.  The next day, down.  I was so torn between hearing the mixture of good and bad that my mind needed a retreat.  

Couldn't it all just be fixed?   If only things in the "grown up" world had such simple solutions like braces and hair products.  Trust me.  I've tried my own type of fix-it remedies.  I have tackled more house projects in the past month than I ever thought possible.  Truth be told, there's nothing like a good house project, but more than that ... I found myself scurrying to find numbness.

On May 7, we were told our baby's heart had stopped beating.  Our second miscarriage in three months.  On May 8, I went to the hospital for surgery.  On May 9, my jaw locked.  On June 3, I spent my morning in an MRI machine.  The results of the MRI - the right and left TMJ meniscus have been dislocated leaving me with very limited range of motion.  The treatment.  A bit unknown.  You can imagine my response to hearing my chiropractor telling me he can't FIX this.  What?  Isn't that what is supposed to happen?  You have an issue and it gets fixed?  You get answers.  You get resolution.  You move on.  That's life, right?  

Not mine.  Not lately.  My life, as of late, has been a bit messy.

But tonight, I saw these pictures of Eli.  I looked at his face and his eyes.  Joy in the midst of the mess.  As I shuffled through these images (there are about 20 in all), I began to pray that I might begin to delight in all of this.  That my eyes would have the same reflection as I process loss and the unknown.  Because Eli does not doubt for one minute that his mommy is going to clean up the mess and I, too, can have the same confidence that my Father has great plans to turn what I see as a mess into something much greater.  

Dear Aunt Irene,

Thank you VERY MUCH for the Pittsburgh Pirates shirts.

We love them!

Love,

J. Howard and Eli

TNO ... and some BIG SWIMMING NEWS ...

Tuesday Night Out. Our latest (and to date ... my most favorite) family tradition. I suppose I can "blame" the creation of TNO on my silly jaw. It's locked. It's been locked for 29 days (but who's counting). And by locked, I don't mean, it gets caught up ever so often ... nope. I mean, full on ... LOCKAGE. For 29 days, I have only been able to open my mouth 1/2 inch.

Because of my inability to eat anything that can't be squished up into a pint size piece, we have become frequent guests at our local Jamba Juice. And while we were there and I was perusing all things I could eat smooshed up in a blender ... I saw a sign for Buy One/Get One Free on Tuesday nights! And as you all know, I'm a sucker for a deal ... hence ... the beginning of TNO!

On this particular Tuesday, we started the evening off with a light swim. Thanks to Cake and Pap Pap, both boys now have Body Glove suits! And Ben didn't want to be left out ... so he threw on his own rash guard.

(This was J How in 2007 ... wearing BG suit #1 ... giving us his cheesy smile!)

Eli, our little beached whale, has zippo fear of the water. He blows bubbles and kicks like crazy!

J. How, on the other hand, is more calculated. He HATES water on his head and is a bit fearful (... um ... kicking and screaming fearful) that you're going to let him go which is SUPER FUN and a bit deafening! But some kind folks in Mayberry, who saw us suffering (and probably wanted a little peace and quiet), gave us a tip: If you use the swim suit/vest with floaties ... you are no longer as top heavy and swimming is super easy!

It just took a little convincing ... and he was OFF! On his own. Swimming without help! I'm not going to lie. The "Mom, don't let me go" showed that the kid needed me around (it was loud and it would have been more pleasant if it wasn't accompanied with SHRIEKING) but still ... he was clinging to his mom. When that quickly changed to, "Look at me. I don't need you to help!" ... there was a little smidge of my heart that felt crushed! But at the same time, I was thrilled to witness his new accomplishment and found it maybe even more special to watch him from a distance and be his cheerleader!

Me and the boys ...

And one more of our little swimmer.

And to top off the evening ... you got it ... Jamba Juice, aka ... My Blended Dinner :) We sipped our juicy treat all the way to Polar Ice where we watched little kids play "hogg-eee" until we froze our feet off and headed back out to the heat!

We Had Our First Taker Uppers on Our "Cool" Offer ...

And it's a good thing they didn't waste any time in accepting because J. How has declared that his slide is only fun WITH FRIENDS!  

So ... here is Mr. I'm Not Having Any Fun Yet Because My Friends Aren't Here ... 

Also known more locally as The Slide Inspector! (And don't be concerned about his haircut that almost looks from this angle to be the makings of an 80's BOWL CUT ... this is just photographic proof that I need to work on my blending skills!!)

And Eli ... well, he prefers some ice cold milk and a rocking chair to the fast paced 

"sliding lifestyle" ... 

I gave Miles fair warning that the water was going to be chilly ... 

And he didn't seem to mind a bit ...

Kate, on the other hand, was a bit less impressed with the freezing water temps and made herself cozy in the sun ... until ... wait, what was that Kate?  Where are you going?  :)

The boys practiced their golf swings ... 

In between Eli stealing the balls ... 

Mikele and the boys raced around the circle ... 

And Kate didn't even have to worry about her hair drying on its own ... thanks to Benni and the Speed Dryer 2009!  That's what I call fun!

Who's up next???

The Coolest Parents in Mayberry ...

Some people are naturally cool.  Others ... well, we need a little help.  Last weekend, I got a little boost in the cool department.  Not just any boost.  We're talking the kind of boost that when my children are in therapy years later - talking of all the things they missed out on as children ... and the floral car seat I made them sit on ... I can hold my head high and know ... that back in the day ...  

My children had ... a WATERSLIDE!

The story of "How We Became the Coolest Parents on the Block" ... is a long one ... it involved traveling to Costco with our neighbors (who split the cost of the slide with us so they too could also be skyrocketed into the realm of cool) ... nothing.  Walmart.  Nothing.  And then, Shelly hit the jackpot.  KOHLS.  50% off ... PERFECT!  It took mere seconds to inflate and then it was FUN, FUN, FUN!!

J. How on his first trek down ... 

Our version of Splash Mountain ... 

Mr. FEARLESS!

Um ... change that.  Mr. Sort of Fearless who'd prefer that his mom was totally focused and was available to catch him as he plunged into the freezing cold water instead of snapping pictures. 

And just in case you needed further proof of our new coolness ... we documented the night with with a picture of our purchase.  

Okay .. so who wants to come play??

Time To Bust Out the Leg Warmers ...

Where was J How in the 80's when Jane and Richard needed an assistant?